Damn Pygmy Puffs
by Isha-libran
Summary: Hermione can't forget Ginny's remark,and her hormones are running away with her...


Title: Damn Pygmy Puffs

Ship:Ron/Hermione

Rating: T for Hermione's naughty thoughts.

Timeline: Post Won-Won… )

Word count:1,137

Disclaimer: It's all Rowling's, I don't own anything. I'm doing this for fun, so please don't sue me, I'm just a poor college student.

A/N: Inspired by this exchange from chapter 25 of HBP:

'_Three Dementor attacks in a week, and all Romilda Vane asks me is if it's true you have a Hippogriff tattooed across your chest.'_

_Ron and Hermione both roared with with laughter. Harry ignored them._

'_What did you tell her?'_

'_I told her it was a Hungarian Horntail,'said Ginny, turning a page of the paper idly. 'Much more macho.'_

'_Thanks,' said Harry grinning. 'What did you tell her Ron's got?'_

'_A Pygmy Puff, but I didn't say where.'_

_Ron scowled as Hermione rolled around laughing._

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Damn Pygmy Puffs

What was wrong with Ginny? What the _heck_ was wrong with her? What kind of sister just threw out words like that—without a second thought?

Hermione was going mad. And it was all due to eight simple words, spoken in jest by Ginny Weasley.

'_A Pygmy Puff, but I didn't say where.'_

She had laughed when Ginny had first said it, but now she was lying awake, even when it was well past midnight, trying very hard not to think about where one Ronald Weasley might have gotten a hypothetical Pygmy Puff tattoo.

It had only been a little while since they had started speaking, and as such it was too soon for her to start _feeling_ for him again. He had hurt her deeply by snogging Lavender Brown all over the place, she couldn't just forget that.

But the thought of that damn Pygmy Puff just wouldn't get out of her head.

If he had one, it should be blue, she thought. Like his eyes. He had very blue eyes. It was a beautiful colour, it would look good against his fair skin. And it should be on his bum…

No, no, no, Hermione thought, shaking her head vigorously. She did NOT just think that. No thoughts of Ron Weasley's bum, she scolded herself.

But it _was_ an exceptionally nice one, and a tattoo would look great on him _just there_…

Hermione sighed in frustration.

Why the heck did Fred and George have to come up with the idea for the creatures, anyway? Sure, the Pygmy Puffs were cute, but what practical value did they have? They weren't like kneazles, or owls—they just sat there, looking all cute, and fluffy and purple…

Ooh. Purple.

Now that would be a truly _terrible_ colour for a tattoo, especially if it was on Ron. It was too wishy washy a colour for someone who had as strong a personality as he did. He needed something like…red. As fiery as his hair. Yes, that was a good colour. And maybe the tattoo could be on his shoulder…

She smiled as she imagined a bare chested Ron turning his head and grinning at her over his shoulder while a bright red Pygmy Puff rode on his shoulder blade...

Hermione remembered seeing Ron without a shirt once, when she had gone to the Burrow the past summer. It was before Harry had shown up, and they had tramped down to the lake for an afternoon swim when she noticed that Ron had grown into his long body. As he stripped off that awful orange t-shirt, his freckly muscles stirred some new feelings in her… wonderful feelings that, even now as she stared up at the canopy of her Hogwarts bed, made her blush.

Frowning slightly, she again contemplated Ron's non-existent tattoo.

Maybe red wasn't such a good colour for

Perhaps green? Yes, a green one, below his neck and right between his shoulder blades. That would be a nice place for a tattoo. It would look very manly.

But then a Pygmy Puff wouldn't be a good image for Ron now, would it? Maybe a phoenix? That would look _great_, all reds and golds, with its wings spread across his shoulders…

Or even a Gryffindor lion. On his back. It would symbolise him very nicely, for though it had been Harry who had pulled Gryffindor's sword from the Sorting Hat, Ron was a true Gryffindor if ever there was one.

He was always ready to do anything for his friends—he had braved Acromantulas for her—he was aggressive—he had blackened Malfoy's eye once, she remembered ruefully—he was brave to the point of foolhardiness—she shuddered as she recalled how he had sacrificed himself to the White Queen—he was loyal—always defending her when Malfoy called her a Mudblood—he was faithful…

Hermione scowled. He hadn't been very faithful when he had gone running to Lavender Brown, had he?

Hermione had asked him to Slughorn's party, _she_ had taken the risk and invited _him_—and what did he do in return?

Take up with that—that—airheaded twit who giggled insanely over everything he said and called him _Won-won_, for God's sake! That twit who was even now sleeping just a few feet away from her.

She took a deep breath, immediately feeling a little bad for her dormmate. Lavender had cried herself to sleep for a week after she had broken up with Ron, and things had been frosty between the three Sixth year Gryffindor girls for a while.

Eventually, they had started speaking again, and Hermione had to admit that Lavender had taken the break-up far better than _she_ had taken their sudden relationship. _She_ had sulked for the better part of two weeks, avoiding Lavender at every opportunity… At least Lavender was being civil.

Well, if she was honest with herself, she did have a small part in the Lav-Lav debacle, as did Ginny. The younger girl had later confessed to Hermione the whole story about their awkward meeting in the hall, and how she had told Ron that Hermione had kissed Krum. Ron had always had issues with his self esteem--and when Ginny had actually made fun of his inexperience, saying that he was the _only one_…

And Hermione had never _told_ him that she had asked him to Slughorn's party as a…well, a date. She had assumed that he understood, after all, what had they been doing for the past three years?

She had forgotten that Ron was used to wearing his heart in his sleeve. If he felt anything at all, he let it all out, which was part of the reason they fought so much. He was used to having his emotions all out in the open. And when it came to matters of the heart, he needed to have things spelled out for him.

Hermione sighed, repositioning her head on the pillow. She had promised herself that they'd start all over again when Ron had been nearly poisoned. Tears pricked her eyes. She had almost lost him…

She wouldn't think about that now. They had broached the subject of their fight awkwardly when she had gone to visit him after his near death experience, and there in the Infirmary, they had hesitantly spoken of Krum and Lavender, and Hermione had felt that _finally_, Ron had gotten it.

No real promises had been made that day, but she was sure that now they were moving inexorably in the same direction towards _something_…and whatever it was, they would get there together.

Well, now that she had started to decide what sort of tattoo Ron should have and where, she may as well finish it, Hermione thought wryly. Who knew, maybe one day she could actually help him make that decision…

----

End

A/N: Just a bit of PWP (Plot?What plot?) fluff that hit me unexpectedly. And yes, I did once spend a similar night as Hermione, wondering where _exactly_ a Pygmy Puff would fit on Ron's body…

--All comments and concrit very welcome! Thanks for reading : )


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